German Pancakes

My mom made us hot breakfast every morning before seminary. On days when it was hard to get up, the smell of pancakes and homemade syrup wafting down the hall always forced us to get up. Now that I'm the mom I'm wondering how she did it. At our house Saturday is the only breakfast my kids look forward to. Every other day is processed cold cereal that is probably giving them cancer. So I am going to attempt to feed my children more nutritious food, especially Luke. A couple years ago he was diagnosed with Aspergers. A little shocking at first but once I accepted that as fact, I set off on finding the best way to help him function seamlessly in the world. Started with medication. Did wonders for him. He went from getting F's on spelling tests to 100%. He has a genius mind underneath the clouds in his head. But then the eye tic started. Rapid eye blinking, freaked me right out. So I took him off and went back into denial. He didn't need that stuff. Went the rest of the school year and summer without it. But when school started again class was even harder for him to focus and homework was torture. So we went back to medication this year. We are on our third med and thought we hit jackpot but he started a different tic, throat clearing. So now what. When I don't give him medicine he can't think and he asks for it back. But the side effects aren't worth it. I pray to know what to do. But I don't feel an answer. I feel so lost on the whole matter. What do I do? What's the best thing for my boy? For now I am going to turn to food. Force him to eat healthier and pray that helps repair his brain so that he can focus and I can can have peace of mind. So for breakfast we had German Pancakes. (GMO-free) Luke was not happy about not getting regular pancakes. But I found a way to get eggs in his body today. It's going to be a struggle the whole time. Hopefully it will be worth it. Keep your fingers crossed for me.

A Sunday At Home

I had to stay home from church today with Ethan. His snotty nose has turned into a fever and goobery eyes. I hate missing church. Even just missing one Sunday can effect how my week goes. But knowing that John needed to be there for his calling, I opted to stay home. I have visions of having a yummy meal cooked, a clean house and a napping baby when the rest of my family returns home. Ethan and I chopped potatoes and ham and loaded the crockpot while listening to the BYU channel. After the regular Sunday programming, they started last weeks conference address with ASL. It reminded me of my college days and my wishes to learn sign language. As I watched them sign away, I realized I have forgotten most of what I had learned. I realized I still have a desire to learn some kind of trade to contribute to the world. So for now, I am mommy and that is enough work for me, but soon Ethan will be off to school too and then it will be my turn to further my education or learn a new craft. So I am glad that I got some alone time with my sick baby. I am glad I got to listen to the words spoken at conference again. And I am glad for the realization that I need to learn and grow and stretch my brains.

Ashley

I have been thinking a lot about my Ashley lately. I feel grateful to have such a sweet girl to take care of. She is always trying to please her Dad and I. She loves to help out in the kitchen. She does chores on command and loves to help me "Fly" around the house. She is always quick to remind John it is Friday, which is Elvis movie day. She loves to have sleep overs with her brothers. I am realizing that not are girls are this way. I would never look at Ashley and think, "That one is going to test me." I think I was a lot like her when I was a child. Still to this day I like to please my parents.

Ashley will be starting school in the fall. Looking back over the past five years. I wish I had played with her more and read to her more and put her to bed with a song and a kiss instead of "If I see you peek your head around that corner one more time..."

So from now until August and forever, I hope to have less regret when it comes to my Ashley. I hope to have lots of secret shopping trips to the Jewelry Box, late night ice cream girls talk and many trips to the library for new Fancy Nancy books.

Why is it that the obedient kid is always the one who gets ignored. No longer Ash, no more. You are my one and only lady, and we are going to be best friends for life. Love ya.